Photogyric
by sailortsun
Summary: Plants typically move towards the light as it grows, thanks to the plant hormone auxin. Akin to the plants, as he is embroiled in the aftermath of the Fourth Shinobi World War, Sasuke finds himself going to where the light is — Hinata just happens to be in the way.
1. holding onto gravity

**HOLDING ONTO GRAVITY**

* * *

 _I think I can feel the weight of the air_

 _Like the whole world's gravity rests only on me_

* * *

He was awake now, but he decided to keep his eyes closed. There was a ringing sensation in his ears, and usually that didn't throw him off. But, this time, the ringing sensation was accompanied with a thundering pain in his head. He wasn't surprised, given what he had been through (or what he can remember going through), but the two usually came separately. When operating together, it managed to make the Uchiha feel wearier than usual.

His head was throbbing, with the side of his head feeling as though it was pulsating. It was a migraine, and he could do little about it. Sakura had already given him enough recommended pain medication. Even after "pleading" (which was merely him asking once again) with her, she refused. She informed him of what he had already known; his body would take care of the rest, accompanied with time, and that he was lucky he was able to heal quicker than others.

"Not as quickly as Naruto, of course." She had added jokingly in that moment. Sasuke merely frowned at her.

That was how most of their interactions had went, from what he could remember. Superficial, barely scratching the surface. There was an instance where she tried to talk to him — like _talk_ to him. But, she dropped it in a heartbeat, and Sasuke could only assume it wasn't easy for her to be attending to a former teammate who was _this_ close to killing her; a teammate who has constantly let his team down.

Suddenly a lot less inclined to destroy any and all of his relationships, now that he was down an arm, he had asked her once before. He had asked how she had felt about everything — how she was _currently_ feeling.

And the only answer he had gotten was in the form of a wistful smile, followed by a soft, " _too much_." And that was when he took into consideration all the little factors. The way she hesitated before she came in to check on him, or the way she'd bite the inside of her cheek to keep herself from frowning openly at him. After that short response, he realized how much of a toll the whole situation must have been taking on Sakura.

Although, 'realized' was probably the wrong word. He had known all along the extent of misfortune and anger his actions had brought upon Sakura, Naruto, Kakashi — everyone, basically. It was just that it was only _now_ that he allowed the thought to sink in. And when it did, he made an effort to stop being so difficult. At least to Sakura, that is.

After all, how was she supposed to feel? Angry? Sad? _Happy?_ And that was just it. She was feeling every single emotion in the book, and it only served to make her frustrated. He thought that maybe once Naruto was well enough, the three of them could have a… _talk_. To finally have laid things to rest and reach that point of mind numbing catharsis.

His eyes already closed, he shut them even tighter when another wave of pain washed over him. Keeping his eyes closed was the one thing he could do right now to ease himself. If he had opened his eyes, he'd be met with the blinding bright lights of his hospital room, with the sterile walls and floors threatening to suffocate him. He didn't need any more strain.

Aside from occasionally tightening his lips to form a straight line, and furrowing his brows, it wasn't physically evident he was experiencing in pain. Lying straight in bed, he could only imagine how much Naruto would be complaining right now, keeping the mood in his room boisterous and lighthearted. He must have been in tremendous pain, but he was probably still thinking of everyone around him – simply wanting them not to worry (too much) over him. Annoying as he his, Naruto's ability to make people feel better was a gift. Now that they both lost an arm to each other, Sasuke figured he can throw Naruto a compliment now and then. Never to his face, of course.

He shut his eyes tighter again when his head began to hurt more. Reflexively, he tried to move his left arm and touch the pulsating area of his head, to no avail. He had to stop himself from wryly laughing at his failed attempt at moving his missing limb. He didn't want to draw attention to himself. There was someone in the room, but he couldn't tell who. He didn't wish to exert any more effort just to discern whose chakra was merely feet away for the past few minutes. He guessed it was an aide of Sakura's, judging from the sounds they were making. It sounded as though the aide looked through his chart at one point, rearranged the things on the table next to him, and drew the blinds that Sakura had left open in order to spite Sasuke. He could still hear the joy in her voice when she had checked up on him earlier, and chirped, " _Rise and shine_!"

He must have slightly rustled the sheets when he tried moving his missing left arm, because he could faintly hear the aide's footsteps coming closer. He mentally cursed himself for not being as still as he could be, because now he'd have to suffer through having human contact. Ah, yes. Other things may have changed, but that good old Uchiha angst will never seem to leave him.

Much to his dismay, he could hear some mumbling. He couldn't hear much over the ringing sound in his ears anyway, but the aide seemed to have a rather soft voice. She had tried to speak with him on multiple occasions, but he'd always rebuff her efforts. Before he can physically reject her by turning on his side and turning away from her, he heard her mumbling stop, and the left side of his head suddenly felt much cooler. Her fingertips laid themselves gently against his skin, akin to a feather's weight.

He felt her fingers delicately put some paste on his head, and then lightly massage it in. Although, he wasn't sure if it was a paste or not. He figured pastes and salves were always thick, but the substance she had just placed on his head was rather light. Her movements were careful, and her fingers were as cool as the paste. The cooling sensation was a change much appreciated.

He made no effort to move, even when she had removed her fingers away from his head. She started to speak again, and this time, Sasuke tried paying a bit more attention.

"…slight fever." He heard her say. He raised a brow, questioning her without having to look at her and without the need of words, and she repeated herself.

"You…have a slight f-fever. Migraines are to be expected. I-" She spoke slowly, and it began to irritate Sasuke, so he interrupted her.

"And _what_?" His sentence was more on the gruff side than he intended it to be, which seemed to spook the aide. She spoke faster now, but stuttered more.

"J-Just some s-salve," she informed. "I hope i-it works. I'll, um," she paused, and by the sounds he heard, seemed to have done something. "I'll l-leave it on the table if you'd like to use it a-again."

He didn't reply, and she didn't push him to. She merely placed her fingers on his head again, leaving it there sitting idly for long enough that Sasuke lost his patience and questioned her (which wasn't long at all).

She didn't draw away her hand right away. She said whenever she had migraines, she'd like it when someone would place something cool on her forehead.

"I-Is that okay?" She asked him. He could feel her looking at him, and the trepidation she was feeling seemed to come off of her in waves and engulf the air in the room. He frowned at her question, but he didn't reply, nor did he move away.

She took his silence as acceptance, and kept her hand there. A lock of hair seemed to come onto his face, and she had leaned over just a bit more so she could brush it away gently. When she did, he took in the vague, peculiar scent of ramen mixed with cinnamon. He was about to question it, but he bit his tongue. No need to show any interest, he figured.

After another minute of somewhat awkward silence, she withdrew her hand, which Sasuke felt the lack of immediately. Silently, she shuffled some other things around on the table, and spoke again.

"Sakura's probably aware th-that you have a fever," she said slowly, recalling that Sakura had already done her rounds. Sasuke stopped himself from berating her for her sheepishness, and allowed her to continue.

"I'll…remind her just in case."

And that was that. She gave him one last goodbye, and turned to leave. Waiting until he was sure her back was to him and she was far away enough, Sasuke opened his eyes.

The aide that smelled like cinnamon and ramen had long dark hair which followed her every movement obediently. After a second of getting used to the light and surroundings, he could tell that her hair was a deep dark shade of purple. The door opened, and then closed, leaving Sasuke by himself again. She hadn't looked back once.

He felt as though he had met someone with hair like hers – the color at least. It must have been brief and she must have not been able to make an impression on him because he could barely recall the meeting.

But _now_ , at least, he can distinctively remember the odd scent of cinnamon and ramen commingled.

* * *

After skimming through its contents at light speed, Sakura held her clipboard to her chest. She walked down the hallway briskly, her heels clacking on the tiled floor beneath her. The hospital was always, in her opinion, understaffed — but now it was unbearable. She didn't expect anything else, given the fact that Konoha itself was still barely standing. Anyone who could move, moved to help Konoha get back on its feet and onto the road of rehabilitation.

Which, of course, left Sakura juggling both of her responsibilities of being a medic-nin and a shinobi of Konoha. When she wasn't at the hospital, she was helping her fellow comrades try and return Konoha to a more stable state; to help return it to its previous state. As a result, she was spread _far_ too thin. Her only solace was the fact that the hospital was one of the first things that was almost completely done being repaired, which made things immensely easier for her. Tsunade had done her best at trying to secure more people to help out at the hospital, but the help she had gotten was barely satisfactory. However, at this point, any kind of help was appreciated.

The more critical cases always found itself onto her lap, seeing as she is the Hokage's esteemed protégé. As a result, she found herself treating both of Konohas 'heroes' — although she's sure one of them would merely cringe at the idea of being declared a hero. Actually, she's pretty sure that the public sentiment regarding Sasuke was still vastly negative. Even if the general disproval regarding the Uchiha had died down since the war ended, it still hung in the air. It probably will for a very, _very_ long time.

Sakura was also convinced that the only reason that she was the leading medic nin on both of their cases was merely because she was the only one who could put up with either of them. On one hand, you get a brooding, angst-ridden, slightly evil man who no one really feels comfortable being in the same room with. On the other hand, you get Naruto. And Naruto does not shut up. He keeps on going and going and going and —

Sakura stopped momentarily just to take a breath at the mere idea of having to check up on Naruto. _Again_. It took a lot out of her, being around him when he's in that state. And the fact that he's still constantly smiling and talking and just — just being himself. It hurt Sakura, because she knew that he was hurting. He, of course, refused to show anyone that he was.

After all, he was alive, wasn't he?

Although there were some days she pushed seeing Naruto to the very end of her hospital day, her checkups on Naruto were never as hard on her as her checkups on Sasuke were. Being in the same room as Sasuke simply suffocated her.

She felt like a child again in his presence — unassuming, and naïve.

Every time she steps into his room, the anger and frustration bubbles up inside of her. It rises, and rises, but it never escapes in its original, intended form. Instead, it melts into concern and converts itself into compassion. Because, try as she may, she could never hate him.

Yes, bits and pieces of him she does indeed _loathe_. But how can she hate him as a whole? How could she hate his entire being? She wants to, but it wasn't possible.

She knew she was doomed to unconditionally love and care for the Uchiha, the same as she did for Naruto. It was her cross to bear. The three of them will _always_ have an unspoken bond.

It was in that sense that she always regressed to being a child in his presence. And to get it away from it all, to get away from Sasuke when it all becomes too overwhelming, she goes to Naruto. To retain a shred of dignity, she tears herself away from the boy she once knew, to the one she always will.

And here she was, at his door again.

She pushed the door open, and exhaled.

And there were two of her biggest supporters, sitting, watching with unbridled glee as she walked in and closed the door behind her. And with their smiles, she no longer felt the clipboards weight and all the names scribbled on it weigh her down.

But this feeling of bliss was short lived. Her nose scrunched up in mild disgust, and she gave the two an exasperated groan as the smell of ramen wafted in the (once) sterile air.

" _Hinata_." The stern look Sakura gave the girl by Naruto's bedside only gained her a sheepish smile in response. She glanced at the bowls of ramen on the table, and then eyed the two. She had caught them in the act.

"I told you," she sighed. Placing the clipboard on the other table, she walked over to Hinata and Naruto. " _No more ramen_." Hinata tried bringing up the fact that he was _just_ getting his appetite back, but Sakura still retrieved the bowl from her.

"But _Sakuraaaaa_ —," Naruto drawled. He was about to continue, but Sakura shot him a piercing gaze.

"No. Ramen." And with that, she quickly disposed of any and all items relating to the one food item in Naruto's diet. Naruto merely sunk bank into his pillow, pouting. If he had both his arms, Sakura was sure he would've crossed them in an attempt to look annoyed.

Shaking her head at his antics, she told him to stop getting Hinata to get him ramen. This only made Naruto sink even further back and frown childishly at Sakura. The Hyuuga giggled behind her hand, gaining back Sakura's attention.

"And _you_!" Sakura said in mock anger. Hinata's smile only grew wider behind her hand as Sakura came closer. She playfully (and softly) placed her fist on the seated girl's head.

"Stop giving in to him. You reek of ramen now, too."

Hinata looked up at her, a shy smile adorning her features.

Sakura was always fond of Hinata, but even more so now. Hinata was one of the first people to jump at the chance to help Sakura — without being asked! Her quiet company was something Sakura appreciated during the more hectic times, and it will something she will continue to appreciate. Sakura knew she had countless of people in her corner, but Hinata was different. Hinata was her beacon of light — she served as a constant reminder of why she should keep trying to make things better. Because Hinata…Hinata never stopped trying. In the subtlest of ways, Hinata was always doing _something_. However little, however big — Hinata was actively _trying_ , all with a smile.

She was a calming presence, and she could not have made it this far without her. She was always checking up on her patients when it got too tough for her, or too hectic, or just too overwhelming. When she couldn't bear to be in the same room as Sasuke for much longer, Hinata would be there to take over.

To Sakura, Hinata was just bathed in sunlight. Glowing, and warm. Something comfortable.

"You're so lucky you're cute." Sakura said, smiling down at her. "Or else I would've banned you from this room for breaking the "No Ramen" rule."

She then began to check on Naruto and his current condition. And, not surprisingly, he has made remarkable progress — but the Kyuubi could only do so much. Time still plays a huge factor in the Uzumaki's recovery; time and patience would heal all that medicine couldn't.

As she continued her checkup, Hinata reported her time with Sasuke to her.

"H-He still seems t-to have that fever," she said. "I g-gave him some of my salve. I hope that's okay."

"Of course that's okay," Sakura said, as she examined the function of Naruto's left arm. His right arm ended in a stump, but Tsunade was working on something in regards to that.

"H-He talked to me today," Hinata added in. Sakura paused for a millisecond, before she continued her work.

"He did?" Naruto asked incredulously. His unfaltering gaze on Hinata made her fidget slightly, and she willed herself to repeat the Uchiha's words. She was still getting used to being with him in such close proximity. At the end of her recount, Naruto lightheartedly joked that even Sasuke's cold heart wasn't a match for Hinata's kindness.

Sakura watched as Hinata's cheeks grew red, and smiled to herself. She began to inspect the stump. She prodded the skin, feeling for anything. Naruto and Hinata chatted lightly, with their conversation mostly consisting of Naruto speaking, per usual. After confirming that nothing was wrong, Sakura went back to her clipboard and updated Naruto's charts.

"I'm going to check the East Wing, and then I'm going to go see if Tsunade needs me to do anything outside of the hospital." Sakura informed the two, when she finished noting Naruto's condition onto the paper.

"You've got this covered, Hinata?"

A smile, and a nod.

And Sakura didn't need to say thank you, that she knew, but she did anyway. And then, she was on her way.

"Sorry for making you get me ramen." Naruto said, flashing a toothy grin that indicated that he wasn't really that sorry. Hinata pointed this out, and he laughed, throwing his head back into the pillow.

And then he talked to her, the direction of their conversation aimless. Just words escaping their lips and dispersing in the air, killing the silence that made Naruto so uncomfortable. His words were quick, fast, and loud. Hers were soft and slow, and she listened with patience.

 _A calming presence._

In the moment Hinata was talking about what the weather was like outside, as she her face away from him to look out the window, Naruto took her in silently.

He still hasn't said anything about what she had done. Nothing about what she had done _before_ the war for him, _during_ the war for him, and _after_ the war. He claims to not know where to start, and though he knows he is dense, that was only an excuse.

He just has, as always, too much to say.

Sometimes he feels bad when he thinks about how she must feel, being around him when he hasn't acknowledged anything. But the feeling goes away as quickly as it crept into his heart, because he knew that she wouldn't want him to pity her like that.

He knows he should reply, but he was too scared. He didn't want anything to change. He didn't want her to change and _he_ didn't want to change. And even though he puts on a front of being boisterous and carefree, everything has changed in a matter of months.

And he desperately needed Hinata to stay the same — to be a source of stability and remain stagnant.

But still, he should say something — _anything_. Something that had substantial meaning and wasn't just noise to fill in the gaps.

"Hey, Hinata," he began, cutting her off as she was talking about how the birds in the forest were beginning to come back.

She turned slightly, so she could face him again. She's gotten a lot better at maintaining eye contact in general, and in maintaining it with him. As such, Naruto could see the slight color in her cheeks, and the way her eyes seemed to take him and his whole being in.

"Thank you." He said.

"W-Wha—"

"I know it's not just for Sakura — all this that you're doing. Thank you. You're a good friend, Hinata". He gave her one of his cheekier smiles.

And he watched as her cheeks grew in color as she brought her hands to her face. She cupped her cheeks and told him that was the least that could do.

"I-I mean the r-ramen is just an excuse," she said, her hands now covering her face. "A-An excuse to…see…you." Her words trailed off near the end, but Naruto still caught them.

A pang of guilt later, and Naruto smiled openly at her. She became a lot more forward, he noticed, the more time she spent with Sakura. Which was a blessing in disguise, since Naruto truly is a dense idiot.

He leaned over, and with his right arm, he moved her hands.

Unblinking, she stared owlishly back at him, her cheeks getting redder by the second.

"Thank you for being so patient. I —" He paused. "I don't take any of this for granted."

After a second of being in awe of his sincerity, and his sudden seriousness, Hinata willed herself to calm down and managed to get the color in her cheeks to die down a bit.

She gave him her own small smile, and placed a hand on his.

"I know you don't."

Naruto didn't know what he did to deserve someone like Hinata in his life, but the way she looked at him made him feel like he was somebody. And before he could fixate on how long her eyelashes were, and how soft her hand was and how _right_ it felt for it to be placed on his, he quickly cracked a joke and returned back to normalcy.

* * *

 **a/n** : this chapter's title was taken from the song "holding onto gravity" by NELL. incredible song! also look at me starting something that starts in the hospital...yet again. and having to deal with scents for the first chapter...yet again. LMAO

didnt think i would come back to this but a lovely reviewer from rubatosis told me to keep going or to try new things and for now, new things it is. thanks for the encouragement! hopefully my writing isnt as horrible as it was before ;;;;


	2. melted

**MELTED**

* * *

 _Time passes like the way water flows,_

 _I'm building a dam called memories_

* * *

On instinct, Hinata turned around as soon as she heard the sound of faint rustling. Momentarily pausing on updating his charts, she watched silently as Sasuke laid in bed, asleep. A slight frown found itself on her lips as she watched him — it was as if she was checking up on a mannequin.

He was always so _still_. Unmoving, as though someone had placed an invisible weight on his chest. Sometimes, Hinata would find herself wondering if he was dead (which was silly of course) and would hold her own breath as she watched and waited to see the slight movement of his nostrils flaring from breathing out (sillier, even still).

And aside from trying to keep himself from moving, he'd rarely ever speak. He had spoken to her, for the first time, a couple of days ago when she had brought salve. After that, it was silent, more or less. Not that she was offended, of course. She doubted that he even knew her, since Sakura had filled her in and said that Sasuke still thinks — and refers to her — as the aide.

So, obviously, she wasn't expecting small talk or anything. But even when he wasn't moving or looking at her, his standoffish attitude still made itself known and still managed to make Hinata feel a bit uncomfortable. It takes a lot to make Hinata uncomfortable, thanks to her fellow Team Eight teammates. Being around two adolescent boys as they go through puberty made her tolerate and become accustomed to a _multitude_ of things. Not to mention the fact that Hinata was also there for Kurenai for the majority of her pregnancy; she was a witness to the morning sickness, the food cravings, the mood swings and well — _everything_.

So it's safe to say that Hinata is a tolerable person who rarely experiences any feeling of discomfort (discomfort that isn't related to her shyness, that is). But, Sasuke is the one exception.

She wasn't scared of him or anything…anymore. There was a time where she did regard him as the big bad wolf, but Naruto had assured her on multiple occasions that he's not _all_ that bad, and he did play a part in undoing the Infinite Tsukuyomi. It was just that whenever he did manage to force himself to utter a word or two to her, it was laced with such a chilling indifference that Hinata would be left wondering whether or not she had wronged him in some way. Sakura had assured her that was merely his personality, and that was enough to make (most of) her worries cease. Even if she wasn't _scared_ , per se, she'd always be wary.

Sakura did tell her that Sasuke does talk to _her_ , when she works up the will to see him. According to Sakura, she and Sasuke were 'making progress'. Despite this, it was obvious to Hinata that her friend wasn't still completely ready to be with the Uchiha more than she was required to.

As a result, Hinata decided she'd be the one to check up on Sasuke when Sakura wasn't able to. It was the least that she could do for the girl, especially since she can't help her with her conflicting feelings. At least, by doing this for her, Hinata was easing some of the weight off of Sakura's shoulders. Not only that, but it kept her busy.

Hinata has been desperately trying to keep busy ever since the war has completed its course. She refused to slow down, and in doing so, she was able to prevent herself from falling victim to her own thoughts.

And so, here she was.

It was a bit stuffy in his room, so she had taken the liberty to take off her sweater and place it on a chair in the corner of the room. She continued to update his charts, taking note of what Sasuke ate, and what he pushed off to the side and didn't eat. Filling out as much as she can concerning his condition without Sakura by her side, Hinata put the clipboard away once she was done. She placed it near the salve that seemed to have remained unused since she had last opened it — not that it mattered. She didn't expect him to actively use it or use it at all. Offering the salve to him was merely a gesture of goodwill, more for her sake than his.

Making sure her footsteps were light, Hinata made her way over to his bedside. She always felt like even the slightest of sounds may wake up him. She looked at his food tray again. He had insisted that he feed himself, with no assistance offered from anyone. Sakura had warned her about this, and told her to steer clear when he does attempt to feed himself. The advice fell on deaf ears as Hinata once made the unfortunate mistake of trying to help him back in the earlier days of his admittance to the hospital.

Even without words, the very look he gave to her when she attempted to help him was enough to send shivers down her spine. She learned that day that the one thing in this world that might be on par with, or greater than, Naruto's ambition, would be Sasuke's pride.

Although Naruto was getting his appetite back, it seemed as though Sasuke wasn't. Even with what little was given to him in the first place, he still managed _not_ to eat over half. She eyed the sliced tomatoes that seemed to have been picked out of what they were in originally, and placed to the side of the food tray. Hinata knew Sasuke liked tomatoes.

And Hinata only knew Sasuke liked tomatoes because Sakura, without fail, made sure there were some for at least one of his meals, lest his appetite come back.

A small frown formed when she began to think of how she would've felt if she couldn't eat her beloved cinnamon buns.

Not having an appetite must suck.

But before she could delve further into her thoughts of a cinnamon-less world, Sasuke slight rustling beneath his sheets pulled her back into the present.

And there she saw it — the grimace settling on his face as he slept, the little beads of sweat that she almost always misses, and the way he seemed to sink further into the bed.

It was a regular occurrence, but she never knew what to do.

Sakura told her that it was okay to just stand by, just in case. Just to let it pass _. It'll be over soon._

And Hinata would do just that, because she doesn't really know anything about the person who was in the same room with her right now.

All she knew was that he was having a nightmare.

It was surreal to her. Here she was, with one of the most powerful people in Konoha, witnessing as he underwent such a vulnerable moment. To see him be so defenseless, unable to fight whatever was ailing him in his dreams…

Hinata would never admit it but it filled her with quiet, guilt-ridden ease. If she had to describe _why_ it comforted her, she'd say because it made him look so human. To know that there are things that still faze him, that still shake him to his very core. It makes her see him less as a figure to be feared, respected, or both, and more as a simple person with his own fears.

And at the same time, it scared her.

What could he dreaming about?

What could be so bad that _he_ would be reduced to this?

She watched pensively, waiting for the frown lines that are slowly receding to disappear completely. She waited for the storm to pass.

 _It'll be over soon._

It didn't, however, and his eyes snapped open.

A small sound escaped Hinata's throat when she realized he forcefully tore himself away from his nightmare, and was now looking dead at her. She wanted to take a step back, and maybe just walk out of the room completely, but her feet were being oddly stubborn. Her mouth hung open in the shape of a little 'o', and if the Hyuuga elders saw how ungraceful she was being, she knew she'd get a stern talking to.

He said nothing for a while, and they stayed like that, with Hinata timidly peering down at him as he looked up at her.

His stare unnerved her.

She almost wish he had his Sharingan on, even though she knew it would take quite a toll of him and maybe his eyesight. She figured _anything_ would be better than looking into his eyes right now.

His stare left her rooted in place.

It was as if she was staring into an abyss.

 _Cold and unfeeling._

He finally spoke, his eyes still never leaving hers. Now that he was staring directly into her eyes, he could at least affirm some part of her identity.

"Hyuuga."

Hinata snapped her mouth shut, and gave a meek nod once she realized he was trying to identify who she was.

"Hyuuga…" He trailed off, as though trying to remember something.

Hyuuga. _Hyuuga_.

He raked his mind for names, and there was only one who seemed to hold any significance. He was sure the aide _wasn't_ the person he was thinking of, but the name rolled off his tongue before he could put it away.

And the stunned look that dissolved into a frown, and then into complete apathy that he earned from the girl when he uttered the name ' _Neji'_ , made him assume that something must have happened to him during the war.

He wasn't sure if he ever knew what happened, or if his memory was being foggy again. But the myriad of expressions she gave, before settling into a listless one, made him wonder.

Not one to be sensitive, he asked her quite bluntly, because the apathetic look on her face made him regain the sliver of curiosity he had once held for her back when she smelled like ramen.

"Dead?"

"Dead."

The room was quiet after she answered with her curt response. She averted her gaze, and shuffled to another part of the room. He followed her with his eyes. He knew she was expecting him to ask for her name, so that he can remove her image from the dead Neji, but he never did. He was no longer interested. The sliver of curiosity was crushed.

She left soon after, the look of indifference never releasing its grasp from her features. He probably should've mentioned to her before she left that her sweater was still here, but he opted not to. And then he was alone again. He always loved his ability to drive people away. It was easier to be alone.

Alone.

He stayed there, lying in bed. He stared at the ceiling, trying not to let his thoughts wander. He tried to focus on the sterility of the ceiling, and forced himself to wonder who kept it so clean. But his resolve chipped away with every passing second, and he thought about what he dreamt about.

The more he thought about it, the more he felt as though the mere memory of it was crushing him. It was as if its very essence took a solid form, much like a Susanoo, and was knelt on his chest, its hands enclosing around his neck.

He breathed in and breathed out, trying to keep himself from letting the name of his brother slip through the cracks.

The more he tried to keep him out of his mind, the more he intruded his thoughts.

All it took was for him to feel as though something touched the center of his forehead ever so slightly, and the world around him began to burn.

And no matter how _desperately_ he wished that the flames would devour him, he was still there. In the middle of it all, he still had to stand witness.

Alone.

And in the agonizing and confusing pain that his brother's death still brought him, as horrible it may sound (although he couldn't care any less) he could only find solace in the fact that Neji's death had affected the Hyuuga girl in such a way as well.

Misery loves company.

* * *

"I'm not sure why I had actually accepted anything different," Sakura sighed out as she observed the scene before her. Kakashi was sprawled out on the couch with one of the lewd books he was infamous for reading resting on his face. Though he donned the Hokage attire, it was Tsunade who was sitting in the chair and busily filling things out.

Hearing the exasperated tone in his former student's voice, Kakashi sat up, holding the book to his chest as he tried to fabricate an excuse.

"Well, Sakura. I _would_ be doing all these Hokage like things, but I —"

He was effectively cut off with a raised hand from Sakura who sighed again.

"Save it for another day," She said, well accustomed to his frequent excuses. He relaxed back into the sofa, looking as content as could be. Sakura could easily tell he was smiling under his mask. Spending years learning from the man proved to be useful in one category — deciphering body language and identifying emotions.

Knowing better than to distract Tsunade from what she was currently filling out — who knows how much time it took Shizune to pester and convince her to start Kakashi's work — Sakura took a seat near Kakashi on the couch.

Effectively stopping him from opening the book and continuing where he left off, Sakura asked him how long he planned on having Tsunade _'show him the ropes'_. He deflected the question by shooting one right back at her, asking her how long _she_ planned on having Hinata check in on Sasuke for her.

Too tired to come up with a retort, Sakura bit the inside of her cheek.

"Touché."

And with that, Kakashi opened the book, and began to read. It was silent, save for Kakashi occasionally asking Sakura about Sasuke and Naruto. Not looking up from his book, he'd playfully chastise her for giving him long, detailed reports on Naruto's state and only force out one sentence updates in regards to Sasuke's condition. She scoffed at this. She knew that Kakashi loved his former students more than anything else in the world, but Sasuke was special to him. Not that she minded it or anything.

She knew he had, and probably will always, feel guilty for what happened to Sasuke. No matter how many times Gai, Naruto, Tsunade — anyone — would tell him that he was not accountable for what happened, that it was ultimately Sasuke's decision and his own actions, he wouldn't listen.

That was the cross mentors like Kakashi had to bear.

"It's not like _you_ visit him." Sakura said, rolling her eyes.

He stopped reading for a second, closed his eyes, and then cleared his throat. She could practically _hear_ the cheeky smile that was quickly forming underneath his mask as he told her that he was " _too busy_ " to go and visit.

Before she could argue with Kakashi, which was quickly becoming one of her favorite pastimes, Tsunade gave out a huff which signaled that she was done with what needed to be done at that moment.

At this, Sakura rose. She had come to see Tsunade, and not Kakashi. It was the former Hokage who had summoned her, anyways. She greeted her current mentor with a bright smile, which was answered with the Senju's own greeting and small, warm smile.

Kakashi made gagging noises at the scene unfolding, to which Sakura put an end to by shooting him one of the glares that she has perfected over the years.

If she was the same person before she met Tsunade, she would've been mentally screaming ' _shannaro!'_ at how quickly Kakashi backed down.

"Pay the ass no mind," Tsunade said, as she walked over to Sakura from behind the table. She placed an affectionate hand on Sakura's head, tousling her hair and transforming it into a pink mess.

"Has it gotten longer?" She asked, removing her hand from atop the girl's head. Her protégé's hair was well past her shoulders now. Sakura touched the ends of her hair, and twirled a lock around her finger in consideration.

"I think so." She said, letting the pink lock run free. "Too busy to cut it."

"Why not ask Ino to help you cut it?"

Sakura shook her head at Tsunade's suggestion. Ino was busy, and was usually off helping Sai do god-knows-what. She was the one who introduced the two, and now she couldn't help but think she had created a monster.

"Hinata?"

At this suggestion, Sakura could do little but pout.

"She's been already doing so much for me," She said. "Especially when it comes to the hospital and —"

"Sasuke." Tsunade finished for her. Sakura nodded.

Tsunade sighed, and ran a hand through one of her ponytails. With this, she knew that Sakura hadn't asked Sasuke about what he wanted to do about his arm, or rather, lack of. She had called Sakura in, because a week ago she had approached her with the idea of using Hashirama Senju's cells to create a prosthetic for both Naruto and Sasuke. She wanted her to approach the two and ask them about whether or not they would be interested.

Aware that Tsunade knew that she had failed to mention the idea to Sasuke, Sakura gave her a sheepish smile.

"I'll ask him today. I promise."

"And Naruto?"

At this, Sakura brightened up considerably. She had told Naruto about the news of reconstructing an arm for him as soon as Tsunade had told her about the idea. He, of course, immediately asked if Sasuke was getting the same option as well. Reassured that his lifelong rival would have the same options as him, he flashed Sakura a toothy grin and said he'd think about it.

At that moment, Sakura had assumed that he'd say yes on the spot. Later that day, however, she realized that Naruto is more introspective than he looks. He would probably ask for other's opinions regarding it first.

And he did. He asked a sea of people, ranging from Lee to Ayame (the latter coming to check up on their favorite customer, of course) whether or not he should do it.

The only opinions that seemed to matter to him that most were that of Tsunade, Sakura, and Hinata.

Sakura, of course, said yes. It was an impulsive yes, but an honest yes. A yes formed with nothing but thoughts of love and care. Tsunade listed his options, the pros and cons, and then weighed in with her own yes.

Hinata asked him what he wanted to do. And when he said he wasn't too sure, he laughed to cover up the sudden seriousness that was in his voice — to cover the uncertainty and the slight tremble in his voice. All Hinata did was smile. She smiled and reassured him that it was okay to not know. As long as it was what _he_ wanted to do, it would be the right decision.

And then she chimed in with her own shy _yes._

"He's agreed to have it done," Sakura said, excited at the prospect of being able to aid Tsunade in something so incredible, and excited at the fact that Naruto would be gaining something new.

Tsunade shared the girl's enthusiasm and joy with a hearty laugh.

"That kid, I swear…" She trailed off, a wistful look in her eyes. If Jiraiya was here to see what his student was able to accomplish he'd just — Tsunade cut her thought short once she realized she was fixating on the past again.

Clearing her throat, she reminded her to talk to Sasuke.

With slumped shoulders, she agreed, and began mentally preparing herself. Tsunade then thanked Sakura for coming out to see her, and bid her farewell.

Turning to leave, Sakura casted a glance at Kakashi.

"Are you coming?"

He rejected her invitation with a wave of a hand, claiming that he had too much paperwork. Sakura giggled when she heard Tsunade angrily huff as she found herself back at the table, getting ready to "help" Kakashi with his hokage duties again.

"And besides," Kakashi said, putting down his book. "I can't hold your hand through this. You have to deal with it."

And the smile on her face dropped again.

It didn't help her to know for a fact that with how his one visible eye was squinted, he had one of his shit-eating grins plastered on his face.

* * *

Konoha was always pretty warm throughout the year, even when it rained. Hinata was still the type to get cold quickly, and her sweaters were always her saving grace.

Right now, unfortunately, she remembered a certain favorite sweater of hers getting cozy and comfortable on a lone chair in Sasuke's hospital room. She cursed at herself for forgetting.

Thankfully, it was sunny (but not too sunny), and the breeze was light. Her arms were bare, but no goosebumps formed yet — quite the silver lining.

Even though she had already checked beforehand with her bloodline activated once she was nearing her destination to see if anyone else was here, she decided to look around once more for good measure.

She wouldn't have minded if there were people here. She just felt more at peace and more comfortable and more in tune with _him_ if she was here alone.

Walking past the other markers, she made her way to his. Kneeling down, she fingered the lettering on his headstone with a light touch. There were no flowers here, but she figured Hanabi would visit later on in the week and bring flowers with her. No matter how busy her little sister may be, she always made sure she had some time to spend with Neji, as did Hinata.

She was supposed to come tomorrow, when she had more free time, but she just felt so drained. Having heard Sasuke say his name in such a callous tone only served to fuel her want to see him. To talk to him.

It made her upset, but then she realized that Sasuke and Neji probably had little no rapport. If he had shown false kindness and sympathy, it would have made her even more upset.

With a sigh, she plopped down. Usually, if she was with other Hyuugas, she'd sit in seiza style before his grave and formally pay her respects. But now it was just the two of them, she sat cross legged, her hands placed behind her as a way to prop her up.

She missed him so much. So much that it _hurt_ and it was the type of pain that strangled every bit and part of her. She felt guilty, because she tried her best _not_ to think of him. Whenever she thought of him, she'd just get so overwhelmed. That's probably why hearing Sasuke say his name upset her so much.

Because she was trying not to think.

It was in the quiet, that she remembered him and missed him the most.

It was in the quiet that he reigned. His movements were always so subtle, so silent, and yet so refined. It was in the quiet that he took care of her when training was too rough. It was in the quiet that he was her eyes when she couldn't use hers.

And the fact that it's all past tense now made her feel so disgusted — disgusted because she will never not believe that this was her fault.

She parted her lips to let a sigh escape, and she willed herself not to cry.

She still had so much to learn from him. She wasn't done living with him, and she wasn't done getting to know him. She will never be done loving him.

Feeling a familiar chakra presence hesitantly come closer, she amended her last thought.

No one will ever be done loving him.

Despite her regular brash attitude, her voice was soft when she called out to Hinata in a form of a greeting. She sat down next to her. Her usually tidy buns were coming undone now, with strands of her hair going rogue.

"TenTen." Hinata greeted.

Awkward smiles were exchanged between the two. This would happen a lot — TenTen and Hinata finding themselves at his grave at the same time. They haven't really spoke before, so there was always an air of unfamiliarity that hung between them.

It was slowly dissolving, however, as these unplanned meetups grew frequent.

"How are you?" TenTen asked, keeping up with the small pleasantries. Hinata replied with an empty, ' _fine_ ', and threw the question back.

TenTen didn't answer. She just looked at his grave. It was quiet.

Because it was in the quiet that Neji was remembered best.

"I don't know what to do anymore," TenTen confessed, after a while.

Hinata gave her a side glance, and then reverted her gaze back to his grave.

"None of us do."

"It's hard."

"It is."

"I miss him."

"Mm."

And then TenTen scooted closer to Hinata, trying to brush the unfamiliarity away. Hinata took this as a chance to rest her head on the older female's shoulders. TenTen, in a hushed tone that she rarely ever uses, told Hinata that she came today because she was with Lee and Gai today. The three of them were checking for damage on the outskirts of the village. Out of the blue, Lee had cracked a joke, which was, in all honesty, _horrible_ , but Gai laughed. In that moment, she had turned to her left, expecting to see him sporting the same smirk he always did whenever he found Gai and Lee's antics amusing. But he wasn't there, and the fact that she had thought that he would be there made her miserable. Miserable and disappointed. It has been _months_ , and she still has these slip ups.

Hinata didn't dare sympathize _or_ empathize. The Neji that TenTen had known was always different than the Neji Hinata had known. And that was fine, but it meant that their sadness, although equally great and profound, were of different types. Neither of them believed that people could mourn one person in the same way — could _remember_ him in the same way.

And they were okay with that.

"I-It's your turn," Hinata whispered. Whenever TenTen and Hinata found themselves together, they'd talk about Neji. There were sides of him which neither knew. Hinata knew the Neji at home, and TenTen knew the Neji that prospered out on the field.

It was comforting to still be finding out new things about him.

TenTen absentmindedly played with Hinata's hair, which was now about Neji's length before he passed, as she told her about a mission that they had with Lee. Between the two of them, they had thought they had no more tears to shed. And yet, when TenTen recalled a joke Neji made once at Lee's expense, they laughed. And once TenTen started crying, with her laughter still going strong, Hinata started too.

It was bittersweet. But having each other, in that moment at least, did wonders for them. They served to validate each other's feelings, to keep his memory alive. When the two of them together, it just seemed _okay_.

And okay was enough.

* * *

She wasn't sure what exactly she was bracing herself for, but she still took a second to prepare herself before she entered his room.

' _In and out,_ ' she reminded herself. ' _You'll be in and out_ '.

She didn't have to spend too much time with him today, since Hinata already filled out most of his charts. She had come in earlier when he was asleep, and filled the rest out. She did the bare minimum, and was gone.

She kept telling herself that the elephant in the room would vanish when Naruto visited him _with_ her, so they could all talk. But she was just making excuses and she fine with that. Right now, in order to handle everything that was on her plate, she _needed_ these kinds of excuses. She needed a peace of mind, even if it was fabricated on lies.

Sakura walked in, and his eyes were already on her from the second she stepped into the door. She stopped herself from flinching, and closed the door behind her. He was improving, in small ways that most people would have overlooked. The blinds were open today, and he was sitting up.

He only gets up when absolutely necessary, but she figured if Naruto were here to prod him later on getting up and moving around, he would.

 _If Naruto were here_.

Naruto was the lubricant she needed when it came to easing herself into talking and thinking about Sasuke. She thought it was pathetic of her to still rely on Naruto like this, especially in times like these, but she couldn't help it.

Like always, being around Sasuke made her regress to simpler times. She felt like a child and it unnerved her. She liked being in control, but around him, she felt out of place.

"Hey," She said, starting off with an empty greeting.

He greeted her back.

His stare was unrelenting.

She came over to his bedside, opting to sit in the chair near it. She avoided looking at his eyes, and instead looked at his lengthy bangs.

"Your hair grew," She remarked. "If you don't cut it soon you'll end up looking like what you did during the chunin exams."

And here she was again, relying on light jokes to fill the silence. She gave him an unsure grin, and he smirked at the joke.

She knew that he knew what she was going, but thankfully he didn't say anything about it. He simply danced to the same tune.

"Your hair grew too."

Sakura sighed, going back into the chair as she nodded.

"Tsunade said the same thing." She said, recalling events earlier from that day. "I'll get it cut soon."

She grew accustomed to having short hair, and recalled that one of the main reasons that she had long hair as a child was because she thought Sasuke liked long hair. She bit back a smile as she reveled in the warm of the memory.

Ah.

She quickly dropped her smile.

She was doing it again. She was going back in time. Retreating to the Sasuke she had known, and finding solace in the past.

"Naruto?" He asked, breaking the sudden silence that came over them. Without a second to waste, she told him that he was doing fine.

Thankfully, this helped her segue into the real reason she was here. She eyed his stumped arm, and brought up Tsunade's idea. She willed herself to look into his eyes, this time, as he processed what she was saying.

"A prosthetic of some sort?"

She nodded.

Though it has been some time since she's _talked_ to him, she could still tell when he was thinking hard. He squinted his eyes, so subtle that if she hadn't known him for as long as she had it would've gone unnoticed.

A small part of her found it comforting to see that some things didn't change.

"Naruto's getting it done." She informed him. He grunted in response. He was still thinking about it.

"You…you don't have to tell me right away." She got up to leave. She needed to leave before the urge to engage him in talk overcame her. She needed to leave before she brought up the past, and before she asked more about his time away.

The feeling of wanting to tell him that Kakashi still thinks of him fondly, and how Kakashi still manages to get out of doing his work. She wanted to tell him how Sai and Ino were getting to know each other, and how Naruto still managed to make outrageously bad puns that no one laughed at.

Above it all, she wanted to tell him about her. To give him every part of her, just like when they were kids. She wanted to tell him how she'd be helping with Naruto's prosthetic. She wanted to tell him how she was juggling too many things at once, and how she still managed to do it all.

She wanted his praise, but she didn't need it.

She wanted to talk to him, but she wasn't ready.

Sakura stalked toward the door, but he stopped her.

"The sweater," he said to her back. "The Hyuuga aide left her sweater here." She saw the chair in the corner of the room, and the sweater he was talking about. She gingerly picked it up.

Turning her head over her shoulder, she cast him one last look.

"Learn her name, you idiot. She's not an _'assistant'_ or an _'aide'_."

And then she left.

He was alone again. But this time, he had a small smile on his face. That was the first thing she had genuinely said to him. The idiot was used in a more playful, affectionate tone and there was a heavy feeling in his heart.

They were making progress.

* * *

 **A/N:** this chapter's title was taken from "melted" by akdong musician! aka my beautiful talented children! thank you to everyone who reviewed, except that one anon who said some rather unsavory things! i really appreciate every single one of your reviews (when it isnt hate filled LOL) so thank you so much for reading! ALSO feel free to talk to me omg lets be friends or something


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